Justice is getting messy
So I had a coffee with my street friend Bob today and he really opened up. We've been talking and hanging out for a while now and I felt comfortable enough to ask him why he's on the streets. He's always talking about the businesses he owns, his homes, etc but yet he's begging on K Rd wearing the same outfit everyday. So I asked him and he told me how his business, as a sheep farmer, had been sued because he refused to do business with Indian people. Then he told me how since then he's been tried in court for murder in the first degree and rape. YIKES!!!! What do you do with that information? I immediately and naturally began to feel uncomfortable for the first time since knowing him. What was once so natural and so organic immediately took on a different nature; ignorance truly is bliss. He told me how he has won every case, which still begs the question why he's still on the streets, and then he went on about politics and government yada yada. I really did have somewhere else to be and he knew that going into it so I said my goodbyes and we went our separate ways. I saw him walking down Queens on my way back from running my errand and for the first time since I've been in this relationship I didn't want him to see me.
I say all this to my shame. Why should one piece of information change the way I look at someone? On Friday we all spent hours confessing our sins and struggles in front of each other and I didn't blink an eyelid; I didn't judge them or think differently of them; why would I they're my friends? Wait isn't that what Bob is too....my friend? Why then the difference?
I know that the Son of God would continue on............I just.........ugh! These are the things that come into my mind; "Is it safe? Is it smart/wise? Is it appropriate as a young woman to be with a 42 year old man like that? Why does Bob smile at me and swear at men?" Lots of questions and I have a lot of sensible safe answers to silence those questions but yet the Kingdom of God I've committed myself to arouses them back up again. And what then comes to mind is, "If he's my friend; what's the difference? How is his sin any different than mine? You don't even know if he's guilty or not. What does Bob need? What did Jesus do?" Whether Bob is innocent or guilty, the biggest question in my mind is; "Jesus associated with criminals; should I?"
I know what people would say but I don't concern myself too much with what people say as much as I do with what my Savior will say. Is my love conditional or unconditional? Is my friendship circumstantial? If I truly believe that I've made a friendship with this man, which I believe I have, these questions need to be answered if I'm to continue. Because I'm going to keep finding things out about my street friends that make my natural woman feel uncomfortable; am I going to chicken out or am I going to push through?
Henrik Ibsen said, "A man should never put on his best trousers when he goes out to battle for freedom and truth." In other words, justice is messy. Am I willing to get dirty? Am I willing to see things through? Is my commitment to justice and righteousness strong enough to put myself at risk?.....we'll find out.
I say all this to my shame. Why should one piece of information change the way I look at someone? On Friday we all spent hours confessing our sins and struggles in front of each other and I didn't blink an eyelid; I didn't judge them or think differently of them; why would I they're my friends? Wait isn't that what Bob is too....my friend? Why then the difference?
I know that the Son of God would continue on............I just.........ugh! These are the things that come into my mind; "Is it safe? Is it smart/wise? Is it appropriate as a young woman to be with a 42 year old man like that? Why does Bob smile at me and swear at men?" Lots of questions and I have a lot of sensible safe answers to silence those questions but yet the Kingdom of God I've committed myself to arouses them back up again. And what then comes to mind is, "If he's my friend; what's the difference? How is his sin any different than mine? You don't even know if he's guilty or not. What does Bob need? What did Jesus do?" Whether Bob is innocent or guilty, the biggest question in my mind is; "Jesus associated with criminals; should I?"
I know what people would say but I don't concern myself too much with what people say as much as I do with what my Savior will say. Is my love conditional or unconditional? Is my friendship circumstantial? If I truly believe that I've made a friendship with this man, which I believe I have, these questions need to be answered if I'm to continue. Because I'm going to keep finding things out about my street friends that make my natural woman feel uncomfortable; am I going to chicken out or am I going to push through?
Henrik Ibsen said, "A man should never put on his best trousers when he goes out to battle for freedom and truth." In other words, justice is messy. Am I willing to get dirty? Am I willing to see things through? Is my commitment to justice and righteousness strong enough to put myself at risk?.....we'll find out.