Justice is getting messy Part 2

I've been seeking a lot of counsel both from leaders and from the Lord and I came to the point where I don't feel guilty or ashamed for protecting myself. And so unless there are other people with me I will only be able to say hey to Bob in passing. But I'm just learning that safety and obedience go hand in hand. God's not going to send me into situations that cause me to fear because God has not given us a spirit of fear but of power, love and a sound mind. (2Tim 1:7) And should my Lord send me into a dangerous situation then it probably will be unbeknown to me because perfect love casts out all fear. (1John 4:18) I'm not afraid now but I can't be stupid.

So now that my mother is at peace that her daughter isn't hanging out with a potential rapist I can continue. I'm really battling with not getting discouraged right now. I really had a lot of hope in the idea that I can befriend anyone and that the Lord would use that; and not that I think my ways are thrashed it's just discouraging when a friendship fails. When you find out that someone isn't who you thought they were. The idea that Bob didn't see me as a friend but as a potential target both disheartens me and makes me so mad at sin! That when I talked with him that in his eyes he probably saw a young beautiful girl taking interest in him (probably with some sexual connotation because guys do think about sex every 7 seconds) and not seeing a compassionate follower of Christ. And honestly if I had a penis this would not be an issue! If I was a man then I could still be this guys friend. 

"Well Steph you can have an impact with women that men can't."

Very true and valid point. However I don't pass women on a daily basis on K Rd. Believe me if there were more women on the streets that I walk I would be pouring into them and I would be blogging about them. And it's not like I sought out a relationship with a man it just happened so I just went with the flow never looking from an outward perspective at what was or could be going on. I don't do that with people on a day to day; why would I do it now? I hate being limited because of my gender. And I know I need to not look at it so much as a limitation but as an opportunity. In Thailand it will be nothing but an opportunity and an instant connection. But it goes beyond that; I feel like God has given me so much love and passion for people, a love that isn't gender specific, and it just frustrates me to not be able to pour it out on whomever I come by that needs it. IT'S NOT FAIR! 

I know that God made me a woman for a specific purpose and that all I have to do is obey the Lord at His leading. I just need to know where my place on K Rd is now. I've got less than 3 weeks left and one of the major friendships I've made has just had a huge wrench thrown in it. 

Bottom line SIN SUCKS! 

Please pray for protection from getting discouraged and that I would take away some sort of lesson from all this and once again find my place on K Rd. But most of all pray for Bob. Please pray for my friend that his mind would be healed and that someone would come into his life that can be the hands and feet of Jesus that I couldn't be.